Sunday November 23, 2014
Off to Ireland for the Weekend – Ballymaloe beckons
The Sacrifice I have made for West Ham and its inspired manager Fat Sam Allardyce
Video postcard #87 – Our relations with the UK Muslim community – tolerance needed but also honesty

PERSONAL, UNDILUTED VIEWS FROM TOM WINNIFRITH

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Quindell Trading Statement – Folks are starting to see what Bullshit it all is

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Quite simply I have never read such complete and utter bollocks in my life. As I write Quenron (QPP) shares are down by a couple of pence at 151p. That is despite it issuing a trading statement which was meant to appear extraordinarily upbeat. In the old days the stock would have jumped by 20% on this sort of bull. But these days investors seem to be waking up to the fact that it does not add up, that the company is talking patent bollocks and that the cash situation is clearly critical. Chuck in the Red Flags from subsidiary accounts which are landing thick and fast and this one is now in a a rapid spiral towards death.

And so what crap is talked in the statement? Where does one start? At the top my friends.

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Quindell Bulletin Board Moron of the Day: Mr Palmer LSE Board – his “obligation” is to destroy me”

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Oh dear, The Quenron (QPP) shareholder list does contain more than its fair share of complete and utter nutters. On an almost daily basis I am alerted to a post which has been made by someone who really is truly bonkers. I was entertained to see some cretin on ADVFN discuss the “TW Red Flags” on Quenron – apparently having a strong opinion which is not buy is deemed a Red Flag.  However, The Bulletin Board Moron of the Day is “Mr Palmer” on the LSE Board. On a day when another Quindell nutter who boasted on twitter of having a "hitlist" which included myself and Dan Levi has been reported to the Old Bill (not by me as I regard the Met as useless), Mr Palmer takes centre stage.

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Reader Poll Results – which of the Bear Portfolio stocks will crash most by Christmas

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At the weekend we updated the ShareProphets Bear Portfolio compiled by myself, Matt Earl, Lucian Miers and Evil Knievil. So far our average sell is down by 18.2% in just over three months. Better days lie ahead. But which of the ten stocks we expect to slump do readers think will crash most by Christmas. You said:

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Reader Post of the Day - 42 on the Quindell Trading Statement

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I know who poster 42 is and he knows more about Quenron (QPP) than any analyst currently covering the stock in the City. His comment on the trading statement today is bang on the money (or rather lack of it). I shall post my own thoughts later once I have gone through a couple more bogus subsidiary accounts. 42 writes:

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Peter Hill (MA Oxon) of Global Petroleum – a case study in AIM casino piggery

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And this is why the AIM casino is such a farce. The interests of fat cat directors are simply not aligned with those of the owners of far too many companies, that is to say mug punter shareholders.  Maybe they cannot be arsed to read Annual Reports but they should and they should be revolted and revolt. Meet Peter Hill, the CEO of casino listed Global Petroleum (GBP).

Peter Hill (MA Oxon) joined in September 2011 when the share price was just over 12p. Before I turn to what happens next I am always instinctively hostile to those who put the words MA Oxon after their names as Mr Hill does everywhere. I went to Oxford too, but it is just another university. Why tag it on to everything? And while we are about it please do not think that Mr Hill has worked to gain a masters. Like me he graduated with a BA. However at Oxford you can after a few years go back and pay a tenner and go through another daft ceremony to get an MA. At other universities you study to get an MA. At Oxford you buy one for a tenner. It is typical of the conceit of the place.

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But KPMG signed off on it so that’s alright surely. NO!

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I am told that the accounts of Quenron (QPP) must be kosher because the global accounting giant KPMG has signed off on them. KPMG knows all about accounting and I am just a failed fund manager/pizza delivery guy/blogger so clearly know nothing.  Hmmmmm, I fear that some folks are in for a rude awakening.

My first point is that the Southampton Office of KPMG is clearly not staffed by the brightest cookies in the jar. I imagine that up in London they are acutely embarrassed

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Quindell Legal Services – More Red Flags Vicar? Part 1

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And so Quindell Legal Services, the biggest part of the Quenron Group (QPP) has filed its accounts. Also of interest is the fact that it filed two annual returns for last year. Would Quindell care to deny that it had a spot of bother with its capital adequacy forms filled in with the FCA? That might explain a few of the red flags but not all.

The first thing to note is that Companies House stamps the accounts for calendar 2013 as received on October 1st. that is a £150 fine for Quenron. It is small beer although it is good that someone is making money from the company. But it is indicative of a badly run enterprise.

I note also that KPMG – which earned £60,000 for compiling this document that contradicts itself – did not actually attach a signature to its sign off.

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Quindell & Compass Costs: the numbers do not add up and this stinks: the worst filing yet – FCA problems now looming?

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The Quenron (QPP) subsidiary accounts are now landing thick and fast at Companies House and I am ploughing through them but have unearthed the stinkiest yet – Compass Costs. The numbers stated are different in different places, there is revenue missing and there is a curious dividend paid. It stinks to high heaven and since Compass is part of an FCA regulated entity (Quindell Legal Services of which more later) this is certain to attract FCA attention.

Compass Costs was, according to the Quenron RNS, bought on April 2 2013 and is “one of the UK's leading legal costs consultancy and costs drafting firms.” The consideration was 80 million shares which according to Quenron was worth £14 million since the agreed price per share was 17.5p. This was, of course, bollocks as the share price then was 8.7p so the real price paid was £7 million. But remember those two numbers 14 and 7. 

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Reader Poll – which of the 10 stocks in the Bear Portfolio will crash most by Christmas

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So far the bear portfolio of Matt Earl (the Dark Destroyer), Evil Knievil (the fat man), Lucian Miers (the Bard of the Boleyn) and Tom Winnifrith (the Sheriff of AIM) is down by an average of 18.2%. Today one stock leaves the portfolio (New World) having duly collapsed and in its stead goes African Minerals (AMI) which will collapse. But which of our 10 shorts do you think will slump most by Christmas. The deadline for voting is midnight tonight as things are moving rapidly with at least one constituent.

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