Banana Ban at BBC – Saints preserve us

The BBC may not be very good at stopping its staff from abusing kids but when it comes to things that really matter the national broadcaster ( cost to the grateful taxpayer £4 billion a year) is bang on the money. Just look at the way that it is stamping out the menace of bananas.

Glossy posters with a banana with a large red cross through it have appeared all over the grand new headquarters of the BBC. The reason: one member of staff will suffer an unpleasant (not fatal) allergic reaction if he or she comes into contact with these deadly fruit.

Surely it is not too much to ask this sensitive soul just not to go picking up bananas? Er no. Their minority rights (presumably that means the right to inspect the lunch boxes of colleagues) means that all the other space wasters (oops sorry I meant valued employees of the BBC) cannot now bring bananas into designated zones of the building. Perhaps as we used to have “smoking rooms” the BBC could set aside “banana rooms” where folks might indulge their cravings undisturbed.

There are no doubt going to be other BBC employees with allergies to wheat, bread, biscuits, apples, strawberries, dobbing in peadophile colleagues, etc. Will all of them be indulged in a similar fashion? Why not just go the whole Orwellian mile and ban all food from the BBC? Or better still ban all staff from the BBC and just close it down.