‘Elf n’ Safey on First Great Western

I could not hold out. The dulcet tones of Steve “the customer host” lured me to wander along to the “customer service (food and beverage) interaction zone”, formerly known as the buffet bar. Okay, I made that last renaming up but I am sure that if I drop it into a suggestion box, First Great Western will take it seriously.
One latte please.

That will be £2.30 sir. Mein host was a smooth and pleasant. Wish I could say the same about the faux-latte.

“No need to put it in a bag” I said because I am, as you know, a bit of an eco-warrior. “Sorry sir, must do”. Er? “’Elf ‘n safey, sir.” “Just in case you spill it on another passenger.” Okay we are actually at a standstill while we wait for “platform allocation” ( I did not make that one up) at Reading and just how many cups of coffee with lids on were spilled before the brown bag rule was introduced?

Do I really care? Nope. This cotton wool world we live in Britain with silly laws and regulations everywhere does not make me feel safer or happier. I think warmly of the ferry at Butrint ( see HERE ) and life in Southern Albania where you just have to take responsibility for yourself. And now we are almost at Paddington. I am starting to work out how I can “detrain” (I did not make that one up either) in a reckless fashion as my act of rebellion against Graham the Train Manager.