Life is full of surprises. I was not expecting to be unemployed and worth minus £200,000 at 44. But that was just a challenge and one that has been overcome. TW 1 - Offshore asset strippers Minus a hell of a lot! And I was not expecting to be becoming a father again aged 48. But there we go.
It is not as if this venture is unplanned. It has not been easy but the Mrs is now at week 17 and touching wood and fingers crossed all is on track. With God's blessings the baby should be arriving in early September. Changing nappies at 49, hmmmm - again it was not something that I anticipated happening but I am really looking forward to it.
The Mrs works in the public sector so naturally has obscenely generous maternity leave on offer. As a taxpayer I would normally be seething about this, but on this one occassion I celebrate being a beneficiary of our uber-generous State before it heads into bankruptcy. But the time will come at some stage in 2017 when the Mrs has to return to work or opt to be a housewife.
Firstly the Mrs is a feminist. Secondly she is markedly younger than me and has a full career ahead of her. I, on the other hand, am now in my 26th year in the workplace. And thirdly, being in the public sector, the Mrs earns a fair old whack for a job which is not that hard in term time and is a breeze in ludicrously long holidays. As such it is back to the Salt Mines for her and I will be becoming what is known as a "latte Daddy".
I think that involves heading to the posh parts of Bristol to have coffee with, and chat up, the posh young mums and impress them all with how much of a new man I am. Gosh I wish my husband was as sensitive as you. Yup I know Henrietta. Whatever. It sounds like anew diversion. The finances look comfortable and it is time to start a new chapter of life. That means organising two more shows ( UK Investor 2016 on April 30 and 2017) and starting to reduce the writng as of this autumn.
I enjoy writing but want to produce different things when not chatting up the posh young mums of Clifton. So it will be all change come 2017 - writing for pleasure not as a job. This, by the way, is not a late April Fool.