This is how you self express said the midwife...that is the time a Gentleman makes his exit

A couple of midwifes have just visited the Mrs and the 13 day old baby with no name. As I heard the latter screaming I thought I should head upstairs to see what was going on. I am, as you know, a supportive progressive partner if not an outright feminist.

It appears that my son did not like being weighed. I know how he feels. I really do need to get down to the gym. But conversation soon moved on. Before I knew it the midwife was on to the matter of self expressing, that is stimulating milk production and was about to demonstrate finger technique.

There are certain matters that a gentleman does not discuss in public and even as a spectator sport... well I am perhaps not of the modern generation. It was clearly time for myself and my morbidly obese three legged cat Oakley to leave the room.