Divorce

356 days ago

The Ceasefire ends in Gaza and the Orwellian BBC disgraces itself yet again

As ever, the Mrs. puts on Radio 4 over breakfast to push my blood pressure up. I suspect it is all part of a cunning plan to make her a wealthy young widow. “Just a little bit more woman’s hour, that should bring on the coronary,” I can almost hear her saying it to herself.

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529 days ago

Photo Article - an apology to the Mrs, lucky West Ham shirt found no grounds for divorce

Well i say lucky, I am pretty sure that i was wearing this shirt for the 2006 FA Cup Final in Cardiff, the less said about which the better. Anyhow, despite it being somewhat ragged it seems the Mrs has not thrown it out which would, I am sure you will agree, have been grounds for divorce. Thus, as you can see below, I can now wear it for tonight’s match where I shall be joined at the Raven in Farndon by another attendeed at the 2006 match, albeit a scouser. He promises not to mention events of 17 years ago and to become a Hammer for the evening.

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1228 days ago

Photo from the Welsh Hovel - grounds for divorce surely?

I refer not to the photo but to another matter. The photo is included because it is amazingly sweet. Even a hard-hearted old chap like me can be sentimental.

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1843 days ago

Tom Winnifrith Bearcast: Bruce Dickinson is not the heir to Wordsworth but does not deserve to lose £45m

I start with the tale of the lead singer of Iron Maiden and the UK’s crazy divorce laws, then a few words on the shrinking Tory poll lead and what that means. Then two things that really alarm me about Micro Focus (MCRO) and then onto the Neil Woodford blame game and the damage being done by those trying to deflect from their failings in this scandal.

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2379 days ago

Tom Winnifrith Bearcast: can I divorce the Mrs for not knowing who David Moyes is? And when is Sound out of cash?

"So who is this David Moyes?" Asked the Mrs after I said that he had been sacked. Surely not knowing who is the (now ex) manager of West Ham is grounds for divorce or at least a trip to Relate?  I ponder what as a Republican I should do tomorrow before hoping that both sides lose the FA Cup Final. Then I turn to the looming cash crisis at Sound Energy (SOU) how my most excellent broker, Mr Antony Laiker, stopped me being a real tit and losing a packet on Interquest (ITQ), at Scotgold (SGZ) and at Carpetright (CPR).

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2601 days ago

Britain's craziest divorce case - how is a business making £40k worth £1.1 billion?

Given how crazy and one sided Britain's divorce laws are only a complete and utter idiot of a man who is worth anything at all would ever get married. When I married my Mrs I was worth minus money so it was my mother in law who insisted on a pre-nup. Whatever. Anything for a quiet life. But are we seeing peak insanity in the divorce courts?

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2701 days ago

I am such a goddamn fucking feminist - loving life as a primary carer of Joshua

I never thought that I'd be revelling in changing nappies, watching a baby throw his food everywhere and all the other joys of motherhood n the months leading up to my 50th birthday but I am loving it. The Mrs is away for a few days "working" and returns to full time work in ten days, in as much as that is not a contradiction in terms in the public sector and especially on liberal arts campuses. And so, right now I am the sole carer for nine months old Joshua and in ten days time I will become the primary carer. I am such a fucking feminist - I am almost tempted to chuck in work altogether and then go for a divorce taking the Mrs to the cleaners saying that I had to quit my job to look after Joshua. Only kidding.

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2761 days ago

EU's house drunk Juncker can bugger off - his leaks are Mrs May's best present since Jeremy Corbyn

The drunken career politician and all round poltroon Jean-Claude Juncker, aka the President of the Evil Empire, is the source of a leak of a meeting he had with PM Theresa May. He aims to embarrass her - in fact his leak, and the ludicrous demands made by EU leaders for pre-divorce Brexit negotiations, are Mrs's May's best presents since Jeremy Corbyn was re-elected as leader of the Labour Party.

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2868 days ago

Tom Winnifrith bearcast - Insider Dealing is a crime that usually does pay

I have an awful cold so cannot speak properly and the Mrs is giving me grounds for divorce (again) with awful TV choices as I suffer from my ailments. In the podcast I cover insider dealing (ref Logica), buying after a profits warning (ref Red Rock & SpaceandPeople) and why the bulls are wrong even though the FTSE 100 is at a record high (ref Malcolm Stacey)

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2920 days ago

Tom Winnifrith Bearcast: Grounds for divorcing the Mrs, 7 stages of grief (part2) & the stocks on AIM to short

I start with behaviour by the Mrs which is surely grounds for divorce or at least enough to see her lead off in chains by the RSPCA. Then it is back to the seven stages of grief and how it relates to shares. Then I look at the most shorted stocks on AIM as per Steve's article earlier - but also those that should be most shorted but why they are not, i.e. Cloudtag (CTAG), African Potash (AFPO) and the slam dunk zero IGAS.

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2967 days ago

The Mrs has switched channels to watch Graham Norton - surely this is grounds for divorce?

I managed to tolerate her reading inane women's magazines but this really is a step too far. There was I, having done the weekly shop and cooked a full supper after a hard day's work , happily watching Newsnight. The BBC's finest metropolitan liberals had just explained to me how Brexit had ruined the economy anf how Russia was trying to help Donald Trump win the election by cheating, when the Mrs switched channel to the Graham Norton Show.

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2996 days ago

Can I divorce the Mrs for reading Prima Magazine? the case for an Asteroid strike on Britain - women's magazines

Facing her first, unexpected night at the Hospital the Mrs found herself without a book or laptop. As such she needed to buy a general interest Women's magazine. We stared at the selection in the Co-Op before we wandered back towards the ward.

One publication was focusing on a new interview with Catherine Zeta Jones as she pumped her latest movie. This is a woman who has revealed her secrets to magazines and the TV so many times that the whole world already knows everything about her right down to the size of her cervix. In another magazine Claire Balding was promising to reveal all. What? You are a lesbian Claire? FFS I never knew that. You've been keeping that as a well guarded secret have you not? Has 

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3001 days ago

Grounds for Divorcing the Mrs...she just cannot be serious!

Given that she is due to give birth to our son in nine days time I might just forgive her but the Mrs is pushing her luck.

Among the very few possessions of mine that are allowed in the house as opposed to the garage are a signed and framed Mark Cavendish shirt which, given what team it is from, is actually quite rare and a framed and signed Geoff Hurst 1966

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3063 days ago

Is the Mrs reading Grazia Magazine grounds for divorce?

Back in the UK I sit at my desk looking out on a quiet surburban road. It is all very different to the view from the rough table at which I write at the Greek Hovel. I see people, cars and neat brick walls rather than olive trees, sheep, the abandoned monastery and the wild of the Mani countryside. Here in Bristol, I also spot in a magazine rack next to my desk a copy of Grazia magazine.

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3125 days ago

Can I divorce the Mrs for reading Marie Claire?

On the train back from London I did my best to sleep. The Mrs, on the other hand, pulled out a copy of Marie Claire which she now insists that she did not buy but had just "found." I glanced over. There was an article on how women could be more successful in their careers.

Point 8 -Smile. Apparently 

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3154 days ago

If you are rich or hard working don't marry - use high class hookers every night & save a fortune

Another week goes by and it is another week of ludicrious divorce settlements. Greedy women taking their poor lunch-tickets, oops I meant ex husbands, to the cleaners. Anyone with wealth or ambition marrying in Britain today needs their head examined.

Nick Robertson the, rather pompous, boss of online retailer ASOS got taken for £70 million - half his fortune - by his ex Mrs. The argument is that without her there to support his career by looking after their brats he would not have the fortune. That is patently untrue. I have met Robertson, who strikes me as smug and conceited, but there is no doubt that he - not his money grabbing ex Mrs - had the idea, drive and talent to create and build ASOS. Yes the Mrs looked after the brats, but she was doing a job which could equally have been done by an uber-posh blonde Swedish nanny with great legs on £40,000 a year.  

I am sure Mr Robertson could have been persuaded

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3651 days ago

What do you give an ex girlfriend who is getting Married?

I guess in today’s complex world this is an increasingly common dilemma. We are still on very good terms, she knows that I think her husband to be is a complete arsehole but there is a mutual understanding that we do not discuss the numerous reasons why my assessment is correct. So what to give as a present? Since the wedding is in foreign parts and I have left it too late to ship anything that restricts my options.

On the occasion of his first marriage, my Uncle Chris was given by the late David Frost, a voucher to use with a divorce lawyer. As it happens that came in handy fairly soon afterwards. But I very much hope that this would be an unwanted and un-needed gift. As such it has to be an e-book ( with a promise of a hard copy later). Any ideas?

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4176 days ago

Friday Caption Contest on a Sunday – Wendi Deng Edition

News that 147 year old media mogul Rupert Murdoch is to divorce his stunning 44 year old wife of 14 years Wendi Deng has got the media speculating. I would naturally cover it in the style of a Murdoch paper: facts wrong, extreme sensationalism and with no pretence of balance.

And so naturally one wonders what, fifteen years ago, attracted the phew what a scorcher Ms Deng to the filthy old man then aged only 133? But what folks are wondering now is why the split? Already Tony Blair’s office has had to state that the old war criminal is not having an affair with Wendi. Heck, if you were married to the Wicked Witch what could possibly make you want to stray?

And so this week there is again no prize on offer other than glory and a chance to be rude about figures who ask for it but post your captions for the picture below in the comments section by midnight on Friday.

PIC RUPE & WENDI

For what it is worth my entry is:

“That rare entity… a working couple who have not been screwed by Tony Blair”

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