2757 days ago
I did not want to hex my beloved West Ham so not only did I not seek out somewhere to watch the game but I switched off my PC so I could see nothing on twitter. In fact I made sure that I did not know the result until this morning. Here in a Greek Hotel as the bubbles tucked into their breakfast a loud YEEEES went up.
4019 days ago
Sooner or later every Grim Northern Shit Hole will be named the UK City of Culture. Glasgow, a City noted for its obesity epidemic and religious bigotry but little else of note since 1945, has held the title. Liverpool where 95% of the population are on welfare or are habitual thieves has also been a City of Culture. And so it is only natural that Hull should get its turn in 2017 fighting off fierce competition from other post-industrial wastelands where folks have an average IQ of less than the X-factor audience: Dundee, Leicester and Swansea.
The poet Philip Larkin, although born in Coventry, made Hull his home. But he died in 1985. Since then Hull has given us er ……um.
The town is also the birthplace of actress Maureen Lipman (everyone’s fave North London Jewish granny) and of Geneses P-Orridge, the artist who came to fame in the 1970s with a vast sculpture made of Tampax boxes. The group Atomic Kitten performed there last year.
Hull is indeed a worthy winner (after heavy taxpayer funded lobbying from its local council) of this prestigious title.
Well done Hull. For 2018 nominations are now open. It strikes me that with its cultural quarter Stoke is too classy to win so how about a short list of Rotherham (famed for its child snatching, must be some literary trail there), Newcastle ( birthplace of the UK’s most talented chanteuse, Ms Cheryl Cole) and Sheffield which brought us Joe Elliot, the literary and poetic genius behind Def Leppard. All three councils can then spend taxpayers cash enthusiastically to lobby to follow in the footsteps of Hull.
